There are many ways to use the Happy Partners Project relationship check-in deck, with or without a partner. So while we've set the stage for how to use the deck in a marriage or dating relationship, we invite couples and individuals to mix-up how the relationship check-in deck is played!
Here are three ways to use it with your partner and if you're single.
1. As a Visioning Deck -- A wonderful book by Katherine Woodward Thomas called "Calling in The One" showed how its readers could manifest "The One" in just seven weeks. The book promises that people who are "truly open and ready to create a loving, committed, romantic union," can call in a "relationship that will last a lifetime." To achieve this, Thomas puts the readers through exercises designed to visualize a partnership and clear old patterns. This brings us to the first way to use the Happy Partners Project relationship check-in deck -- as a visioning tool, for those who are single or those deeply unhappy in the current relationship but not yet ready to invite a partner into the process.
HOW TO DO IT: Pull cards from each category and visualize your future partner's responses. Focus deeply on the words he / she uses when responding and how his/her responses make your feel. You can also use the cards as journal prompts to write the way you and your partner relate based on a particular card pulled at random.
2. To Go Deep -- Want to dig in on Sex and Intimacy or do you feel your relationship needs mega-support in one area? Use the deck to go deep into that category.
HOW TO DO IT: For 5 weeks, instead of pulling one card from each category, only pull cards from one category. For instance, do you and your partner want to future-gaze and plan for your future? Spend an entire check-in on one single category.
3. As a Partner Quiz -- Shake up your relationship check-in and sharpen empathy by speaking from a place of understanding your partner. Instead of giving your responses, respond with what you know about your partner, and then let your partner chime in to share his / her Truth for the answer.
HOW TO DO IT: Draw a card. Sample Q: "Was there anything I did consciously or unconsciously this week that negatively or positively affected you?" Instead of giving your answer, recall the ways your partner has made requests to you and reflect on the week to see if any of your actions could have impacted your partner. Allow your partner to add on and clarify. In another example, "During sex, I love it when you _____." A response to this would be "During sex, I know you love it when I ________." Allow your partner to add on and clarify, as relevant.
There you have it! Three ways to mix up your check-ins. We give you a starting point but feel free to make it work for you! And tag us @happypartnersproject on social media with your creative uses for the deck!