Does It Feel Like She's Pulling Away?

Awakening Your Divine Masculine Vulnerability May Be the Answer, Starting with These 5 Steps

“In the case of a man, the sacred masculine is what’s left when a man finally gives up superiority, privilege and power over others.” — John Wineland

You feel her growing frustration, her longing gaze searching for something deep within you that seems inaccessible. “I need you to show up in your divine masculine,” she pleads.

But what does that even mean? 

The old delusions of masculinity being bravado, dominant, and stoic emotional suppression now feel hollow. You sense there’s something more meaningful buried within if only you could access it.

The truth is that cultivating divine masculine presence takes bushwhacking through painful clearing work. As Wineland states, you must “give up superiority, privilege and power over others” first.

This means letting go of ingrained notions that masculinity means conquering, winning, and maintaining constant control. True masculine essence isn’t domination, but purposeful ownership of your direction and values.

“The deepest essence of manliness is a still waters kind of depth, a sort of presence — unshakeable. Not inflated, not aggressive, and not anything that could ever be mistaken for arrogance.” — David Deida

Like trees with roots firmly anchored in the earth, divine masculinity embodies a steadiness that provides refuge. Presence, not reactivity. Unwavering commitments, not flighty impulses.

Yet the painful stripping work precedes this reclamation. You must “slay the dragon of untamed desire,” as David Deida puts it. Peel back the emotional armoring that blocks full embodied realness and surrender to vulnerability.

Only then can the more tender aspects emerge — empathy, sensitivity, attunement. Listening without legislating. Owning mistakes. True apologies. These are signals of secure masculine trust and care.

“The masculine holds the space for the feminine, and the feminine expands into that space.” — GS Youngblood

Your partner longs for the container of your noble, earthy masculine presence. Not harsh boundaries of aggression or withdrawal. But an opening of compassionate acceptance for her authentic emotional fluidity and intuition to bloom.

She needs to feel inspired to admire and appreciate your integrity and capacity for commitment. Able to receive nurturing allowance for her own self-expression, whatever arises.

Stop wasting energy trying to perform masculinity through endless solution-providing and controlling fixits. Divine masculinity inhales the entirety of experience with undefended openness. Then exhales the creative visions and directional decision that devoted love demands.

When you embody this transcendent masculine essence, your relationships awaken in reverent wonder. She will feel protected, not confined. Adored, not objectified. Turned on, not imposed upon.

Let’s look at three scenarios that illustrate this: 

Scenario 1: The Date Night Let-Down 

You plan a nice evening out — make reservations at her favorite restaurant, dress up looking sharp. But when she emerges looking radiant, you can’t help but make a snarky comment about how long she took getting ready. Her face falls as the specialness deflates. Rather than connecting over the romantic gesture, you’ve fallen into flustered criticism. Divine masculine presence would be receiving her with appreciation, not diminishing her joy.

Scenario 2: The Intimacy Blockade

Things heat up between you physically, but you find yourself obsessively focused on techniques and her orgasm — causing you to disconnect from the emotional intimacy of being fully present. She senses the disconnect and shuts down, explaining she needs to feel into the love behind the lovemaking. You react with characteristic problem-solving wanting to “fix” the situation, missing that her need is for you to open up vulnerably rather than function on autopilot.

Scenario 3: The Defensiveness Dilemma 

In the midst of a conflict about your lack of follow-through on housework, she brings up a familiar complaint — that she doesn’t feel like you truly hear her or prioritize her perspective. Rather than staying grounded and taking accountability for your role, your shortcomings trigger an age-old overwound response of stubborn justification and deflecting blame. The divine masculine would mean holding restorative space for her feelings and appreciating her wisdom, not armoring up and disconnecting further.

In each case, the man’s inability to tap into deeper masculine vulnerability, presence and accountability blocks true intimacy and connection from flowing in the relationship. His partner’s disappointment mirrors back the growth opportunities awaiting if he can master embodying those aspects of divine masculinity.

Breathe into that call for magnetic depth. Anchor there, and turn your partner’s yearning into rippling fulfillment.

To awaken your divine masculine vulnerability and presence, start by implementing these 5 steps:

1. Breathwork and Embodiment Practices —  Engage in daily breathwork, meditation, or somatic exercises to get out of your head and into your body. This builds interoceptive awareness of your emotional landscape. Try box breathing, body scans, or qigong routines. When you can stay grounded in your physical presence, emotional openness follows.
2. Self-Study Your Emotional Realm —  Observe your emotional triggers and habitual reaction patterns without judgment. Notice how your body responds when you feel criticized, attracted, or anxious around your partner. Lean into the sensations instead of distracting or escaping. Self-knowledge allows new choices.
3. Share Your Real-Time Internal Experience —  Start vocalizing your present emotions, needs, fears as they arise rather than swallowing them. For example: “I’m feeling really defensive right now about what you said because it tapped into my insecurity around ______. Give me a second to breathe into that.” Normalizing transparency builds trust.
4. Listen to Understand, Not Respond — When your partner speaks, drop your urge to formulate a response while they are still talking. Focus solely on taking in their verbal and nonverbal communication with full embodied presence and empathy. Reflect back your understanding before sharing your perspective. Meet them with open-hearted space.
5. Embrace The Full Range of “Masculine” Expression —  Re-define masculinity as holding the full spectrum of human emotion and expression — powerful and tender, forceful and yielding, directive and allowing. Practice allowing all aspects to move through you fluidly depending on the situational needs. Your potent centeredness arises from wholeness.

True divine masculine vulnerability comes from doing the inner work to heal outdated limiting beliefs around what strengths and emotions are acceptable for a “real man” to embody. 

As you peel back layers of emotional armoring, an unwavering presence emerges — grounded yet open, confident yet humble, discerning yet infinitely tender and permissive. This is the foundation of wholehearted relating.

Implementing just the above steps will awaken your divine masculine vulnerability and presence. However, true mastery requires committed practice and expert guidance to unlock your full potential.

In the self-guided “Polarity Unlocked” course, you’ll receive a complete step-by-step roadmap integrating psychological frameworks like cognitive behavioral therapy with wisdom teachings and somatic practices. Through profound self-discovery, role modeling, and real-life experiments, you’ll deconstruct outdated masculinity myths and resistances holding you back.

You’ll gain skills to confidently show up as the grounded, attentive, purpose-driven partner you know you can be. Your woman will feel magnetically drawn to the virile yet tender masculine essence she craves at her core.

Don’t put off the fulfilling intimacy, connection and passion available when you fully embody divine integrated masculinity. Invest in yourself and your relationships by enrolling in “Polarity Unlocked” today.